Theme of The Month - Violence: Violence in Relationships

Violence drastically increases in relationships where alcohol or drugs are involved. Violence is extremely traumatizing for the affected. And remember, there's something more than just physical violence. Extremely aggressive behavior and threats etc. may also be traumatizing for the husband/wife/children.

Many people live in fear of saying/doing the "wrong" things, and therefor trigger aggressiveness, threats and maybe even violence. It may feel like one walks on ice. This is an extremely powerless feeling, and one may feel responsibility to behave "good" or else the "ice" might break. This gives a lot of power and advantage to the violent person.


If anger, threats or physical violence occur one may think: 
- I should've understood...
- I should've thought about...
- I should've been quiet instead.

A victim of ongoing violence is often highly attentive when it comes to the other persons frame of mind, in order to predict eventual violent behaviors. This is especially true in relationships where alcohol and/or drugs are involved, since the persons mood may change drastically depending on the intake of the alcohol/drugs. 

Information taken from the book Relation och Trauma (transl. Relationship and trauma) by Karin Persson

If you recognize yourself, try to seek help! 
It might be extremely hard, and you might be scared for your life.
But think about what may happen to you/your children if you stay in the relationship. There are many places to turn, places that doesn't expose you or your identity. If you have someone close that you trust, the first step may be to talk to this person, and maybe he/she can help you go through this. You don't deserve to be treated this way, and you are not alone!