After conversations with relatives, I have noticed that many stop to mention alcohol or drugs by their names in their communication with the abuser. It creates ambiguity, misunderstandings and promotes denial from both the addict and the loved one. Perhaps the loved one says, "You seem tired today, I don't want to have dinner with you when you are so tired and sluggish." Instead of clearly saying, "I don’t want to have dinner with you when you have been drinking. I like to eat dinner with you when you're sober." The signal to the addict in the first expression is that he/she seems out of sorts and has to be alert if there shall be any dinner. It does not have anything to do with the alcohol at all.
To dare to express own opinions, thoughts and feelings can help one start to feel better.
All the best to you!
/Carina
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