Do you own your own feelings? Or are your feelings dependent on another person's feelings?
That might seem like a strange question. But the truth is, and many realtives will probably find this familiar, the relative's feelings follows the addict's feelings. Being a relative or a close friend to a person suffering from addiction can become an emotional lack of independence in the long run.
If the addict feels bad - then I start to feel bad
If the addicts has a good day - then I have a good day
If they are worried - then I get worried
If they are sad - then also I get sad
and so on...
And if the addict gets sober and takes responsibility for their own feelings and their own life - then there is the risk that I will become empty, not know what I feel, not know what I think, I lose the meaning of my life...
Nothing can take the focus off of myself, I have to explore and experience myself. Who am I? How do I feel, after all?
Who owns your feelings? Who steers them?
Can you be empathic and understanding and still keep on living your own life? Can you take care of your own feelings?
Are you a relative of a person who has an addiction problem? Alcohol, drugs and other addictions have destructive consequences for those who are close. It could be your parent, your child, partner, colleague or another person you care much about. Are you often worried about the person and a lot of your energy goes into trying to help the addict? This blog aims to provide support, knowledge and share experiences about being affected of someone else´s substance use.
Friday, July 25, 2014
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